There are two things causing me great stress right now. Number one, we are going to Disney World in three weeks. Number two, I have to wear a bikini in front of college friends in February.
So, we're taking the family to WDW mid-October. I haven't been since I was two, so obviously I don't remember any of it. I know it is supposed to be the most magical place on earth. So far, I've found it to be the most stress-filled and most expensive place on earth and we're not even there yet. We are only going to go to Magic Kingdom two days. We'll be in Orlando for the week, but aren't going to drag two little kids to the park everyday. I don't think that would be enjoyable for any of us. We're having breakfast with the princesses one morning, and staying late another night for the Not So Scary Halloween Party.
The reason I'm so stressed is because there is so much to prepare. I have no idea where to go once we're in the park. I realize they have maps, but if you know me, you know I like to be prepared. I was always the annoying one in high school and college who planned all the spring breaks and knew exactly where and when we needed to be somewhere. Yes, I'm that girl. Do I bring my stroller or rent one? Do I bring all of Addison's princess outfits? Do I take my big camera or just use my iPhone? Do we need to pack extra clothes? What if the kids cry the whole time because they're hot or tired?
Gosh I sound like a whiner. Sorry. I just feel like I need some guidance. And yes, I realize there are much bigger problems in the world than this. I just want it to be a great experience for everyone and I feel like if I plan everything well enough it will be. I think I'm also a little sad because my mom and dad were supposed to be coming with us on this trip and my mom just isn't ready for a vacation quite yet. So it's a little bittersweet. So if you have been to Magic Kingdom, please help a sista out and give me some input! I realize it's pointless to worry about such silly things, but it's part of who I am. Maybe I should just get on some major anti-anxiety medications or start drinking heavily.
Number two - the much bigger problem - Ike and I are going to Mexico for a wedding in February. One of my best friend's/former roommate is getting married there. I wouldn't miss it for the world. She's a beautiful actress living in LA. She is a friend from college, a very fit friend from college, a very fit friend from college who hasn't had her body remodeled by the art of childbearing. A few other people from college will also be there. We'll be there for several days before and after the wedding, and we're all staying in the same place. It's going to be super fun, but I'm getting very stressed about having to get into my bikini in front of all these people I know.
Last time they saw me in a bikini, I was in my 20's, a Colts Cheerleader, and had nothing to do other than workout and go to class. Now, I'm in my 30's, have delivered two babies, and have no time to work out. I bounced back quickly after having Addison, but after Camden, things didn't go back so quickly. It's like gravity got ahold of everything and hasn't let go yet. When I realized that I'm actually going to be seen in a bikini by my fellow BSU alum, I felt my heart sink. It was like the feeling you get when you're told you have to speak in front of an audience. Lump in throat, butterflies in belly, nausea, sweaty hands - you get my drift, unless you're one of those weird people who enjoys public speaking.
So, I've decided that I am going to start working out a little - hopefully at least 3 times per week. But I'm not going to start until after Disney. I've got to mentally prepare myself. You know, build up to it. I don't enjoy working out. . . at all. I have started eating better recently. If you read my previous blog, you already know that - sorry for the redundancy. The holidays are going to be super hard this year. I can eat my weight in sugar between Halloween and Christmas. Why oh why can't this trip be with fried-chicken-loving, working mothers with several children, who also have no time for themselves?
I'm going to end up a heavily medicated anorexic by the time this year is over. But hey, at least I'll be relaxed and skinny.
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